The very Best Bimmer vs the very Worst Merc

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Imagine a concert that pairs up two great singing talents. Lets say you have Sade and Susan Boyle both belting out the national anthem for the SuperBowl. Close your eyes and you will hear two beautiful voices singing together in harmony. Your thinking, this is very pleasant. Then you open your eyes which quickly focus in on Sade and her smooth stance, beautiful face and sexy slender body. Then your poor eyes glance, only for a moment as they simply cannot stand to focus any longer, at the hideous sight of Susan Boyle. You avert your eyes and concentrate only on Sade. Yes you hear both voices and they sound great, but you cower your eyes in the direction of Sade, avoiding the great sounding but not great looking Susan.

That is how I feel about this video from the great MotorVision channel on YouTube. The Alpina CS is easily at home in any Bimmer fans fantasy garage, in fact its required to be there, you have no choice in the matter. Then you have the BoyleMobile known also as an AMG SLC. This car turns my stomach. Maybe its all those years of detailing them in Bellevue and having to deal with the miserable, snotty, aristocratic owners who are always upper 50s women who think they are Queen Elizabeth gracing your presence. Enough about that horrid machine. Back to the Alpina.

Look at the beautiful engine, a mere 6 cylinders needed to spank the pants off the big V8 in the Merc. The profile is simply the sexiest Bimmer created post 1960s. The forward angle of the nose is so aggressive, like a Cheetah fighting to be let loose to chase down the prey. The prey in this case is easy to catch as it is a bloated and ugly Merc that should be put death by the ohh so sexy Bimmer, excuse me, Alpina!